Darn if it didn't just happen to me again today. There was a soft knock on my door early this morning. I knew my daughter had to be up early but was wondering what she wanted. When I told her to come in, she entered with my hot cup of coffee and my cell phone. Not being quite ready for either of them, I snapped something at her about not being ready but thanks anyhow. Ugh. Once the door was shut again I realized my error. Don't be so busy that you miss the gift.
More...
I was immediately snapped into reality. What was meant to be a sweet gesture was now ruined. Don't you just hate when that happens? Let's say you're washing the floor (I mean, I guess people do that, right?) and in comes your little guy. In his tiny little hands he has some dandelions just for you. Unfortunately he's also bringing in half the yard stuck to his feet. What is your first reaction?
Mine would be to yell, "STOP! Mommy is washing the floor!" I would yell this because I'm a busy mommy and I only have x amount of time to wash the floor and now I have to do it over again and I DON'T HAVE TIME to do it over again. Right? The ideal, of course, would be to take the flowers and send the little guy back out to the great outdoors while you rewashed the floor. Maybe I should have stenciled this phrase on my kitchen wall, "Don't be so busy that you miss the gift."
Fr. Jim and the Porch Swing
There was one time that impacted me so much that I remember every detail of the encounter. I had the opportunity, when I had a bunch of little kids, to spend some time talking to a priest friend of ours. We were to meet at the rectory and then we were going to take a walk.
It was a beautiful spring day, and when I arrived, the secretary told me to have a seat on the porch swing and that Fr. Jim would be out shortly. I sat there enjoying the swing and the beautiful spring breeze. The sunshine was nice, too. But a few minutes turned into a few more minutes and then I started to wonder if Fr. Jim wasn't there. A little more time passed by and then I started to get a bit irritated. After even more time, I was really put off. Didn't he know how BUSY I was. I only had x amount of time to meet with him and here he was wasting it.
Don't be so Busy...
After a little while longer, Fr. Jim appeared with a big smile and a warm greeting. What do you think the first thing he said to me was? "Hi Laura, I hope you enjoyed your time alone out here. I know how busy you are and I just wanted to give you a few minutes to yourself."
Wow, did I blow it. Could I have a do-over?? He had no idea what was going through my head and I was too embarrassed to explain, but man did I feel horrible. That moment has stuck with me since then and I wish I could say I never did it again, but like you read above, I did. Many times since then.
So my hope is that you can learn from my mistakes. My advice to myself and to you is to realize that when you miss the little gifts that people are trying to give you and instead get irritated, you are probably busier than you should be. If you find yourself in that state:
- Take some time to clear your head
- apologize to the person you've upset/offended
- move on and try again
Next time, hopefully, you'll be able see the gift and accept it graciously.