Every once in a while a story pops up in the news about a horrible homeschooling situation. This makes everyone stop for a moment and wonder if the negatives of homeschooling outweigh the positives. Other times it's just a wave of doubt and panic that rushes over a mom that gets her asking the question, "Will homeschooling ruin my child?"
My answer to them? No. And here's why I say that.
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The majority of parents who choose to invest their time and talent to homeschool their children truly do have the best interest of their children at heart. I can't imagine why someone who doesn't would want to have their kids around 24/7.
We're going to go with the assumption that you homeschool because you are trying to do what you think is best for your children.
That leaves us with those moments in life, and we all have them, where we doubt everything we are doing. This begins with pregnancy and continues on throughout the life of the child:
- Should I have that epidural or not?
- Is co-sleeping going to harm her?
- Will letting him "cry it out" leave a lasting emotional scar?
- What if I spank him? Will that damage him emotionally forever?
- Pubic school? Private school? Homeschool? Ach?? Which is the best?
You get the picture. There are so many important decisions we have to make for our children every day that it's mind blowing. How will you ever make all the right decisions?
Guess what? You won't. And that's okay because you have Someone there to help you when you screw up.
(BTW, if you have a hard time working through the decision making process, taking these steps will help you.)
God+You+Your Kids=Awesome
Just like you always hear that it takes 3 to make a good marriage, guess what? It takes 3 to make a good homeschool, too.
Don't ever leave God out of your homeschool. He will be the guarantee that you will not ruin your children by homeschooling them.
Will you mess up at times? Yep
How about make some bad decisions? You bet.
Chances are they won't be as horrible as you think they will be, but even if it's bad, God's got your back. You just need to make sure that you have a good relationship with Him so that you can hear what He is calling you to do. That involves working on your prayer life, so make sure that's a priority!
If it's one thing I've learned through 22 years of homeschooling and 5 graduates so far it's this:
Even if I screw things up or make the wrong decision, God will be there for me and for my kids to bring some good out of it.
Life is Hard
Life is hard in this day and age for young adults. It doesn't matter if they went to school or were homeschooled, they will find themselves in difficult situations no matter what. What's more important for them is that they know how to fight back against the ills of society and save their souls. This can be accomplished no matter how they have been schooled. With homeschooling, however, you simply have more time to arm them with the right tools to do that.
Also, know that God has seen all you have done to give them the best education you can. He will honor all of that hard work and sacrifice and will be there to help your children, too.
I can't stress this enough. Five of my children are now young adults and their education was not perfect. In spite of all the ways I have messed up, I have seen God work in all of their lives to make up for those deficiencies.
Homeschooling Will Not Ruin Your Child
Another way to think about this is to ask if sending them to a school will ruin them? It depends on the child, the school and so many other factors, right?
You have to look at homeschooling the same way. There are so many factors involved in turning out a well-rounded young adult that chances are you won't ruin them just because you homeschooled them.
What you're hearing in your head is doubt and confusion stirred up by the evil one. Doubt and confusion do not come from God. When you hear this noise in your head, turn to God in prayer. Make sure there isn't an obvious problem (if there is, fix it!) and then move on.
Tell the devil to take a hike and focus on what you're doing. Most likely it is all just a temptation to throw you off track.
If you're in this temptation right now and need someone to bounce things off of, I'm happy to help. Just drop a comment or an email and I'll help in any way I can.